baby nurse in a shitstorm

so today was my second day shadowing a nurse on the floor. She had a CRAZY day (both days) although she had *only* 3 patients (most adult med/surg floors you would have 5-6) the patients have complex needs. omg. kids glucose levels rapidly dropping while another kid is needing a med that hasn't been ordered by the doc, threw up her nasogastric tube, and it just went on and on. Plus one of the kids moms yelled at my nurse, and she burst into tears while preparing meds in the med room. I felt so bad and overwhelmed. I mean, i know there will be days like that, but i still don't know how to even work all the pumps, and many of these kids have lines running out of most major organs. SHIT! oh, and speaking of shit. there IS a lot of it. that is not a myth. I think its funny (or insulting) that the perception that the general public has about what "nurses do" is just constantly cleaning up poo or vomit, giving sexy sponge-baths to middle aged men, or being mere handmaidens to patriarchal doctors. oh please, dont even get me started! The work requires complex technical skills, medical knowledge, and mad interpersonal skills. Anyhoo, that said, there is a lot of shit and vomit on this floor. It is a GI floor, so you have to test many of the kids poo for blood (and weigh it, and describe its appearance in detail in the chart) and kids barf, alot. but oh well. Super STinky. i guess i'll just get used to that part of it, and it will make me less quesy. I wanted to work on a medical floor!

Also, they gave me a 2-way pager, so i get pages all day (like "you have a call-parked on 24567" like what the hell does that mean? what? who? where?) that I still don't really know how to answer to respond to. Long story short, its a pretty fast paced environment and its really just hit the ground running. I swear there are like 20 nurses that work on the floor too. I can't even begin to remember who i've met, what their names are, and all that. Geez!

 From here on out, i work 3 12 hour shifts a week (7a-7p). I am tired! I can't wait to get paid! I feel dirty like i need a shower! wish me luck

mmmm. sleeping in and yummy bfast

its funny how i slept until 7am this morning and that feels like "sleeping in." Well i've been getting up at 5am most of this week to be at the hospital by 7. So sheessh! schedule change is rough.

but now i'm eating one of my most favorite simple meals: toasted sunflower mastermacher bread (yknow, the kind that comes in a small square loaf, looks all weird with the 1970's labelling) but it is SOOOO GOOOD. it tastes a little bit sour, like sourdough, but is super dense, nutty and slightly chewy. its really something special when you toast it and smear earth balance margarine and nutritional yeast across the top. DEEELISH> yknow its really the simple things people. my saturday just got better. And i'm feeling a lot better, on the mood tip, since i've been back on a regular life schedule.

I just finished my first week on the job. Well, we have 2 full weeks of orientation, so most of the time was spent watching presentations, reading policies, and filling out paperwork. Its been a bit mind numbing. but the floor is awesome, the hospital is incredible. there is beautiful artwork, mobiles, mosaics everywhere. there is a family education center where families can go, get free tea coffee, use computers/fax machines, find books/resources about medical conditions, and they even have private rooms with beds where family members can spend the night. Its like the disneyworld/hilton hotel of children's hospitals. And it is SOOOO clean. i cant even tell you. its like you could eat a meal off the bathroom floor. Everywhere. Having done my clinical rotations at like, 4 other Philly hospitals, this place looks like heaven. really awesome. I'll be excited to actually start being a nurse. next week i have a couple of shadow days, then the following week i start taking my own patients, and I have a precepter who will spend every moment with me, teaching me, making sure i dont eff up. which is really great and reassuring. I'm super nervous. Working with sick  kids is a huge responsibility, and i don't want to make any errors. So, thats my scoop on the job tip. Studying for my nursing boards (NCLEX) which i take Feb. 9th. Not really making much progress on that front... Also h elping to plan a baby shower for my sister Jess (who is due in April!) we are very excited. If anyone has any recommendations for where to make a registry (besides babiesrus) that has more eco friendly stuff, let me know~! 

oh winter

i think i'm having the winter blues. accelerated by having no school/no job, which one would think could be fabulous and fancy free, i have really been spending so much time in my jammies, in the dark house, surfing the internet, then having long periods of feeling sad and tearful (without apparant reason). i keep forcing myself to leave the house and socialize, but gosh, it feels like such a chore and all i want to do is sleep. Well, i started my new job yesterday, so i'm very much releived to have something to occupy my mind and time. It was really hard to go from having a lot of demands on my plate to having *zilch*. I like to be busy. dont get me wrong i like a good nap and hot bath as well. But these past few weeks have felt just ugh. Why does winter suck? I mean, if its gonna bring  such psychological drudgery, couldn't it at least snow and be pretty and magical a few times already? its just been grey for weeks on end. I just needed to grump for a minute about it. 

birthday blog

so, its so great when your sweetie takes off of work to spend you birthday with you. Jamie made me pancakes. and two tiny ones that he wrote a 3 and a 2 in nutella. So cute! Although, I have to be honest, this is the first birthday that i've really felt not excited about. 32 at the moment reminds me of all the things i still want to accomplish, and that maybe i AM getting older, and bye bye twenties (for real) and hello to my changing body. I dunno, I was sad about it last night. But today i'm seeing the stream of emails, text messages, and (haha) facebook comments wishing me a happy bday, and that feels fun, and like,  right! I should be happy. its my mofo bday!

we are having a rad masseur friend of ours come over later and she's giving us both massages. OH yea, i can hardly wait. Then maybe cuban restaurant for dinner. yum. Maybe 32 wont be so bad. maybe it will rock

happy new years goddess!

Ixchel: the Mayan goddess of the moon. She is also the goddess of birthing, midwifery and healing. 

I am inspired by her on this new  years day. I am also looking at goddess sites for us to honeymoon at. Perhaps Isla Mujeres, one of the islands where Ixchel was worshipped.